The Dream Police who live inside of my head just entered my colon without a warrant — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) March 26, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
There’s never an easy way to tell a good friend that you think his grandmother has a nice ass. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) December 22, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
Test driving a Jeep Compass and the fucking thing keeps facing north. No idea how to get back to the dealership. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) July 1, 2012 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
Daredevil Nik Wallenda walks tightrope across Niagara Falls, Evel Knievel rolls over in grave – breaking collarbone, shoulder, several ribs. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) June 22, 2012 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
Paris Hilton makes DJ debut. I saw her BJ debut online, must have missed her CJ debut but can only guess that’s short for “cranberry juice.” — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) June 26, 2012 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
The Cubs have a player called Kosuke Fukudome and I always confuse his name with the indoor stadium where we used to film porn — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) April 8, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
Wife asked me if Ricky Martin has officially come out. I answer “yes, just now, in that outfit.” #grammys — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) February 14, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
Saturday evening recap: 5 pm — everyone starts drinking. 10:25pm — Gregg asks how to make napalm. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) August 7, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
Good news: Chevy Volt outsells Nissan Leaf 2-to-1 in February 2012!! Bad news: Literally, two Volts and one Leaf. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) March 3, 2012 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
HER: I’m Gladys KnightME: I’m glad it’s night too.HER: No, I’M Gladys KnightME: Yes, I’m also a night person.HER: You’re an asshole. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) April 7, 2012 Inspired by and dedicated to Angela Cox, 1955-2012 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan […]
