Doc asks what’s the problem. I tell him my calves are on fire. “Describe the pain.” I said “no, I’m a veal farmer. I need to use your phone” — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) March 25, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan […]
Turns out NY Giants defensive end Jason Pierre-Paul is a direct descendant of, billionaire hairpiece baroness, Robin Pierre-Toupee Paul. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) February 5, 2012 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
It pisses me off that in another time, there were mothers who would actually take your Kodachrome away. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) June 5, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
I ordered the red snapper before realizing I was at a gynecological clinic and specifically did not want the red snapper. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) December 19, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
I paused the Tivo during a Food Network show just because I wanted to be sure, so I counted and learned Giada De Laurentiis has 68 teeth — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) July 21, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
I was waiting for Sting at the restaurant while he was across town having sex. I waited and waited and waited but he never came. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) November 28, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
Waiting at this Amish Restaurant for my date but … this bar is pretty cozy … and the bartender makes an insane buttermilk martini … — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) December 2, 2011 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
Teacher says, “Every time Cee Lo Green says ‘fuck you,’ an angel gets Type 2 diabetes. — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) January 12, 2012 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
July 27, 1997 — Saratoga Springs, NY Wallflowers opening for Counting Crows and I’m to photograph the first three songs by each. I’m late, cut it a bit too close and hit traffic. Need to find my credentials and get set up, without a lot of time to work with. I’m sent backstage, where it’s […]
Let’s get this straight. There are less than 25 black NHL players but both NHL Network anchors are black and one was in Earth Wind and Fire? — Dirk Dachs (@SoapyJohnson) April 21, 2012 More from “THE TWITTER COLLECTION …” >> Follow: @SoapyJohnson on Twitter. >> Comment: Place it on Lucky Dan on Facebook.
