Monday June 26th 2017

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Random Products

Harley Quinn Pint Glass

Harley Quinn Pint Glass
$12.95
This Harley Quinn pint glass holds 16 ounces of your favorite beverage and is sure to be a hit at ...

Silky Skin Gift Set

Silky Skin Gift Set
$99.99
Make every bath count! The Silky Skin Gift Set has everything you need to nourish and pamper your body with ...

The Hangover Baby Carlos Pint Glass from Warner Bros.

The Hangover Baby Carlos Pint Glass from Warner Bros.
$7.99
Get ready for some serious hijinks with the gang from The Hangover with this cool pint glass! This 16 oz. ...

God love that BCS!!

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Q.  The BCS has to be the most convoluted bunch of nonsense in sports. I can’t believe they don’t have a playoff system. It’s an orgy of chaos. Name another sport that could get away with such a system to determine its annual champion.

A.  I hope they never get a playoff in college football. I’d just like to be on record of saying this. I’m probably the only one who has the guts to go this route but I thrive on uncertainty and can’t help it if I like the system exactly as it is — frayed, battered and completely suspect.

I actually wish they’d go back to the days where the final bowl game would be generally understood to be a winner-take-all for the national title — it would be played on a Saturday but you still wouldn’t know until Sunday night or maybe Monday morning who the champ was because that’s when the final polls were announced. Did #2 beat #1 enough to jump them in the polls? That missed field goal really hurt.

This day of waiting was a chance to second-guess everything that happened in the game. This is like the winning run of Game 7 rounding third and sliding safely past the catcher and then having to wait until tomorrow to celebrate it or possibly be totally livid. You go through the entire day wondering if you’re pissed off or thrilled. It was like most of November and early December during the 2000 election. People ask you questions and you can’t grab onto exactly what they’re saying because you’re still maintaining focus on the game.

Everything was on pause.


You’d have arguments with your friends where you’d be in their face saying Miami would be #1 when all those other douchebags said Nebraska. The waiting made it interesting. Even if you expected the win, at that point it’s like “yeah, I kinda figured that from last night.” You couldn’t really celebrate to the point of overturning cars so you do the only thing you can do — load up on team merchandise as fast as possible to document that you called this once in a lifetime moment and you keep the hat forever.

This retelling of the events supporting your reason why you continue to wear that tattered cap well into your senior years is the type of rocking chair rest home moment that always creeps into memory at the precise time a bowel movement passes and you find yourself still in the rocking chair. When you feel the nurse press a warm rag against your soiled bottom and recognize the embarrassment that goes along with a public accident, this would be a good time to remind her that you were on the Hurricanes from Day 1 and you still have the hat to prove it.

So screw you.

I’d like to see a day where all the teams play in one gigantic playoff. The Steelers win the Super Bowl and have to play the Red Wings in a best of 7 with the winner facing either the Celtics or the Phillies. Winner of that plays God. I’ve seen the line — take Pittsburgh and the points, God likes a good contest. I’m not saying the Steelers will win but they should most definitely cover.

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